Marquette University’s contract with Sodexo, the food services company responsible for supplying and administering Marquette’s dining halls, expires at the end of June. As the date has drawn closer, Sodexo seems to have given less and less of a shit about how the dining halls run.
The telltale signs of so-called “senioritis” – a condition where people near the end of a large endeavor lose all interest and motivation – began appearing around March. That is when the dining service received the first “F” of its collegiate career in Introduction to Health and Nutrition.
“We kind of just meant that to be a senior blow-off class, to be honest. It looked so easy but I think you actually needed to make some decent food, which is more effort than we wanted to put in,” said Sodexo employee Harold Carston.
“Come on, it’s not like any of this really matters,” laughed executive Thurston Fairchild. “We had a net profit of around $750 million last year. What do we care if Marquette dumps us? Maybe we’ll have to reach our hand a bit deeper into our couch cushions to replace that hole in our bank account.”
Symptoms of the encroaching senioritis are most visible in the AMU, where the line to get burgers snaked all the way from Marquette Place to the Brew as two dining hall workers chatted about the ballgame. Across the food court, the ladies at the checkout desk watched “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” on a portable flat screen television.